Just like Buddha had his enlightenment, I had a revelation when
I was around 11 years old on how to look smart. I realized all I needed to get
that nerdish look and enhance my appearance to the next level was a pair of
glasses. I would enviously watch my friends with glasses as they gracefully played
with its frame and finely readjusted it during our casual conversations. However, there
was one major dilemma- I had absolutely no problems with my vision. Still
determined to win my prize, I consulted a few of my bespectacled friends and learned
that chronic headaches can be an indication for prescribing glasses. This
valuable piece of information awakened the amateur actor in me. I would religiously
feign headaches every evening at home. Not only was I close to scoring my goal,
Amma also let me go to bed an hour earlier than my usual bedtime. Killing two
birds with one stone; I was so proud of myself!
After a couple of weeks of daily headaches, my worried
parents scheduled an urgent appointment with an Ophthalmologist. I was excited
and nervous realizing I was inching towards my treasure. Now, I don’t exactly remember how our conversation
went; but I did outline a genuine history of a nagging headache that disrupted my
life. Also, I demonstrated considerable difficulty in reading some alphabet rows
in his vision chart (of course, I was a polished actor by this time). However, to
my utter disappointment, his final assessment after the evaluation was that my
vision was perfectly fine and all I needed to do was eat vegetables rich in
Vitamin A daily to maintain my eyesight. I was in shock; could he deliver such
a terrible advice to a little girl who had strong anti-vegetable traits since
infancy!
My parents were obviously happy to learn that I had no major
health issues. Amma religiously followed the doctor’s advice since then and
served me sliced raw carrots every day. Now I hated vegetables in general; but I
detested carrot in particular as it always made me feel nauseous. So I would
pretend to eat the carrot; but as soon as Amma was out of my sight, I would
quickly hide it in the side pocket of a luggage bag kept under my bed for storing
old clothes (perfect hiding place in my mind!). I stopped my headache drama immediately
so Amma would forget her daily vegetable routine. My yearning to join the bespectacled
league waned off soon as well.
Weeks later, one day when I was back home from school, I walked
into this strange sight of my parents deep cleaning a familiar luggage bag outside
our house (Amma was holding the bag wide open while Papa was ejecting a strong water
jet into it with a hose). I innocently enquired what the matter was. Amma told
me that they noted a terrible smell in my room and traced its source to the
luggage bag. They hypothesized that a house gecko possibly got trapped inside
the bag and its rotten remains resulted in the deadly stench. Halleluzah for
the narrow escape, I said to myself.
PS 1: The title of the story is a cross word puzzle that
always reminds me of this incident!
PS 2: Now that I am older (and wiser) my vision has certainly
regressed, and I need to wear glasses every day and hate it! (Simple ironies of life.)
No comments:
Post a Comment